WHAT PEOPLE CALL ME

Buckle up yall it’s a long one lmao

Gordon MacGillivray - this is my first name but only the government calls me this. I don’t mind but it’s kind of a mouthful, no? Pick one. 6/10.

Gordon - most people call me this who met me after the age of 12. Never felt like it really suited me but it’s fine. 9ish/10. That changes to 10/10 if you say it with a smile, and 5/10 if you’re annoyed or you slam the R.

M’Gilvry - the name I had as a child, the name my parents intended for me. I stopped using it cuz it was heckin hard to say but that doesn’t bother me as much anymore and I love how unique it is. muh-GIL-vree. 10/10.

MacGillivray - the legal spelling of above, the traditional Scottish spelling, the name of my clan. When Scottish people call me this it gives me a shiver of delight. If you say it fast enough it sounds like the abbreviated version. Guess that’s why my mom wrote it that other way. 100/10 if you’re Scottish, 5/10 everyone else.

Allen - this is my last name. If you call me this, you’re probably just confused. I know, I have four last names. It’s ok, I forgive you. 4/10

‘Gilvry - this was my nickname briefly when I was small. 10/10 for family, 5/10 everyone else.

Gordo - Chicano coworkers at multiple jobs have independently decided to call me this. When they say it, I love it. Feels like a term of endearment. 10/10 if the R is flipped or rolled, 0/10 if it’s anglicized.

Gordog - one of my best friends calls me this. 10/10 if you’re her.

Gordy - meh. 3/10

Gilly - there is no faster way to make me despise you, than by calling me this. 0/10

Gordon MacGilli - spammers call me this. That is because the UC Davis web portal forced me to use my legal name for my email account but cut it off after 15 characters. I hate, hate this name, not only because it invokes my least favorite nickname, but because it’s a painful reminder that my university sold my information to advertisers. 0/10.

muh-GUL-free - hate it. Mispronunciation. 2/10.

muh-Gilly - hate it. See above. 1/10

muh-GIL-vur-ee - this is the most common mispronunciation. Pretty close, points for trying. 6/10.

MacGyver - hate it. Some dumb tv character I guess? 0/10.

M’Gillagorilla - one of my aikido buddies used to call me this. Never loved it but I can’t deny that I move like a gorilla on the mat sometimes. 8/10 if you can appreciate the fact that planting my knuckles on the ground and popping up onto my legs is objectively the fastest way to get from seiza to standing.

Sensei - if you call me this, you’re probably four years old, and I automatically love you. 10/10.

Sempai - sometimes other Uchi Deshi who were my juniors would call me this. I loved everything about that life, including the tradition and formality of the naming customs. 10/10 if you’re a mat friend. Nobody really calls me dohai or cohai but I’d be fine with those too as long as they’re said with respect.

Brother - this seems to be especially popular among friends of mine who are followers of Muhammad, peace be upon him. Makes me feel deeply and broadly connected to the human race. 10/10.

Sister - mostly in the context of “I’m with you, sister!” Sometimes a term of endearment by people who have seen my gender shimmer or switch and made room for that. 10/10 when it’s said with love.

Gordonzola - a friend in college came up with this. I think it’s fun. 9/10, still use it as the name for my photography instagram.

G-dog. Homie name. 10/10.

G-baby. Some of my music brothers call me this. 10/10.

Buddy - 4/10. I’m not your buddy, guy.

My guy - 9/10. Yes! I am your guy, buddy!

My dude - 10/10 if you’re Zosha.

Ughh there’s probably so many more. I gotta go chop wood, maybe I’ll edit this later.

Edits:

G! I love G as a term of endearment. 10/10

Brother Bear. My sister calls me this. I love it & I love her. 10/10.